Grief and Goodbyes
While our leave date for our big move to Kenya approaches, and we are eager and excited to permanenly rejoin the AIM Air team, we're also navigating grief as this is a season of goodbyes.
I've had comments of "You must be good at it...it must be easy for you...how is it not hard to say goodbye to so many family and friends?" The answer is "I'm not good at it...it never has been and never will be easy...it is so so hard, in a way that many will never understand."
Goodbyes don't get easier. They get harder. At least for me (Kristal). I grew up as the daughter of missionary parents, and this lifestyle is all I ever knew during my childhood. While goodbyes were a constant reality, it wasn't something I ever mastered. They hurt. Getting closer in relationships was scary as departures and the constant move of our family or friends was always a looming reality.
This reality is something I am all too aware will be a large part of the lives of our children. They will have more goodbyes than they can count. They will make best friends that sometimes will only last a few years before families move. Their time with friends and family in the U.S. will be fractured and need maintained over the distance of oceans. They will know great loss much earlier than I would ever want them to. This we grieve.
And yet...WE HAVE HOPE. Far more than our desire to protect our children from pain, we hope that they will one day understand WHY. Because in light of the "why," the grief and pain and goodbyes and risks and all the weird and crumminess of this lifestyle, IT IS SO WORTH IT. I hope that they know that suffering and pain are oh so worth it in light of our goal of loving and sharing Christ with those that don't know that they are passionately, greatly and aboundingly loved by God. That there is freedom from the pain and bondages of this earth. That they are known and heard and cared for. That their lives have purpose. That they have value. That their pain is seen.
This is why we go.
So in our grief we find joy. In our sorrow we find hope. In difficulties we remember the purpose. And our deepest prayer is that our children grow to know of the hope in Christ, the love of God, and that they one day unquestionably know that the pain of goodbyes was worth it.
"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful." - Heb. 10:23
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